Curveballs

You can count on life throwing you curve balls, many of which can bring you into the darkness.

Maybe you’re back in the very situation you thought you’d never be in again. I know it can feel so darn frustrating to have worked so hard, learned so much, and experienced triumph only for life to whisk you back to places you thought you’d never have to visit again. Here’s the thing though, perhaps some demons are meant to be repeatedly defeated.

What if the real lesson isn’t how or even how quickly you overcome them but it’s how to deeply love yourself through the struggle as you bring yourself back to life again.

Life is a roller coaster, an ocean of waves that brings on storms while also washing away what no longer serves you —often without giving much of a warning. Life will supply you with many lessons, often, by ways of hardship and defeat. The breakdown always precedes the breakthrough. It’s also how you get to know yourself even more intimately.

So what do you do when dark days have made a residence in your life?

Patience, shocker I know —and giving yourself as much time as it takes to heal. Sometimes you just need time to hibernate and temporarily numb your emotions with ice cream, Netflix and to allow yourself to feel like crap and be ok with it —as in without judgement.  Part of the healing process is to allow yourself to feel the full gamut of your emotions. Give yourself permission to feel sad, mad, to yell and cry and perhaps to just be left alone. These are the moments where it’s so important to have even more grace for yourself and know that everything is temporary and this is part of the healing & growth process.

The more you allow yourself to slow down and be with yourself in those dark moments—the faster you heal and come out of the darkness.

Then one day your internal alarm clock will sound, and you’ll be done with being in the darkness. You’ll get tired of it and you’ll recognize the desire to feel alive again. You’ll be ready to climb up again and conquer the world bit by bit. 

Perhaps you’ll finally want to take that long awaited shower and get yourself out of the house to feel the sun on your face again.  Little by little you’ll start to do things that make you happy. Maybe it’s taking a walk, going to the gym, cooking a healthy meal, painting or photographing something beautiful to spark that creative joy within you.

Whatever it is that sparks your will to be happy again, it’s your survival map, an alarm clock to notify you that it’s time to come out of the gloom and start living again. 

Initially, this internal alarm clock of hope will sound so softly that you may hit the snooze button a few times before recognizing that it’s time to wake up. But, soon enough you won’t be able to ignore it for much longer because you’re meant to thrive, to find meaning in your life, and discover what makes you happy. Allow this feeling, this so-called alarm clock of hope to fill your heart again. I invite you to think about what brings you joy in your life. Whatever it is that lights you up, you get to just start doing it now, step by step, and follow your delight.

Little by little passion will creep up on you again. You’ll begin to gain your strength again and before you know it, your thirst for living an inspired life has returned in full force and you’ve conquered your demons once again. You’re now triumphant, stronger, smarter, and different. The silver lining is that with every hardship and every triumph, you shed layers of who you once were and you become an upgraded, often more self aware & more powerful version of yourself.

Remember to be kind to yourself (and others). We all have demons that we’re battling with as we’re stretching towards growth, soulful satisfaction, inner peace & deeper intimacy with ourselves.